Tips for Swinging

So, you want to start swinging? It’s easy to see why: the prospect of having wild sex with limitless partners is a tantalizing one to be sure. But hold on there, tiger! Here are a few things you need to know before you start your new lifestyle:

Talk, Talk, Talk: Before you even attend your first swing party, you need to talk about it thoroughly with your partner assuming you have one. Ask each other what you are and aren’t comfortable with. Assure each other that swinging will not affect your feelings for one another then make a game plan for when you do go swinging. Once you’re at the party or club, stick to the plan and discuss who you both might be interested in. Talk throughout the whole experience. Afterwards, don’t be silent on the car ride home. Both you and your partners will have a lot of emotions and thoughts about what just happened, whether good or bad. Communication is extremely important for both of you to continue enjoying the swinging lifestyle while keeping your relationship in tact!

Mind Your Manners: Always be polite and friendly to everyone, especially when denying someone who wants to play or when being denied. You never want others to feel jilted or have their feelings hurt by you. Also be sure to abide by the dress code and the house rules. Don’t assume that everything you need will be provided to you there. Bring your own condoms and lube and alcohol, if allowed. Remember that swinger communities are tight-knit and word travels swiftly. A bad reputation will follow you like a shadow so always try to make a good impression!

Embrace Anonymity: This goes along with minding your manners. Never ask personal questions like, “Where do you work?” or “Do you have any kids?” You can always get to know someone better after you feel each other out a bit. Swingers come from all backgrounds and some may not want their daily life and swinging life to be intertwined. Just like you, they are there for very specific reasons and small-talk is usually not one of them. Swinger parties are not like hanging out at the local bar. At a bar, asking personal questions may be normal but at a swinger party, it’s just plain rude.

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Stick to Your Gender: If you’re interested in playing with another couple or an individual in a couple, you always need to ask permission first. The best way to do that is to approach the person in the couple that is the same gender as yourself. There’s more than one reason to do this. First, it shows that you are respectful. By not going straight to the object of your desire, you demonstrate patience and good etiquette. Second, it makes the person you are asking more comfortable and willing to play, especially if you are both female. The request comes off as less aggressive which leads to a better experience for everyone. Remember, you do not want to step on anyone’s toes (literally and figuratively!) if you plan on playing.

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Play it Safe: Always demand protection before playing with anyone. Don’t worry about saying no to someone if they don’t want or have protection. Even if you only engage in oral sex with someone, use dental dams and condoms. Be diligent about using protection; when changing partners, always change out your protection too. Swinging can be an amazingly orgasmic experience but it’s not worth it if you contract a disease in the end!

Once you become a swinger, you become part of an exclusive, non-conforming and close community. It really is an incredible lifestyle to lead so be sure to always keep these basic tips in mind whenever you go swinging. Welcome to the lifestyle, friend!

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